day 18: emotions and pumpkins

Anxious- full of metal distress or uneasiness because of fear of danger or misfortune; greatly worried

No that’s not quite right…

Stress- mental, psychical or emotional strain or tension

Worry- to torment one self with or suffer from disturbing thoughts

Apprehension- anticipation of adversity or misfortune; suspicion or fear of future trouble or evil

Maybe it’s a bit of all of these I am feeling today.  Why are there days of “I can so totally do this!” and then days of “why the hell am I doing this?”  Today is the later.

My inventory is still very minimal and I only have 5 weeks and 5 days until the show. Sewing is beginning to be a source of stress. I don’t like that. There was a study done and cited in The Journal of the American Medical Association, that found that women who sew experience a significant drop in heart rate and blood pressure, perhaps because such creative pursuits allow the body to rest from the pressures of everyday life.

I do see how that can be true, but not today.  Today was busy, but fun, but not productive.  We went to the pumpkin patch and a friend’s house.  I love these days, but then start feeling guilty that I haven’t made anything for “the” show. But then days that I spend all day sewing and Kennedy watches way too much tv, I feel guilty because I wasn’t a “good” mom. Oye, the emotional crap is so annoying!  I am sure (at least I hope) that everyone feels this way at some point in time.  There is a balance, I have found it, it’s just lost today. This isn’t my “normal” and I do NOT like it.  But I do like pumpkins…

who knew there are so many kinds of pumpkins
pumpkin love
baby goat loves Kennedy’s hair

What does all this babble, whining and pumpkins have to do preparing for a craft show? Everything! Why? Because there will be days when it feels like you will never get everything done, when you are a horrible parent, and why the hell are you doing this to yourself, but then there are days when you make eight jackets in five hours, you have been accepted to be in a show and you are just crazy enough to believe you can do it.  It’s all about emotional balance.  When you are on the negative, just have fun because tomorrow will be a productive day. Pumpkins, well they are just fun.

to read all 31 days to preparing for your first craft show, click here